Tie Game

One of the things that amazes me the most about the world is that there are men who do not know how to tie a necktie. I should rephrase, that there are men who regularly wear neckties who do not know how to tie a necktie. To this effect, I have ridiculed, and occasionally taught, friends of mine. In a hurry, the old standard Four-In-Hand will do, though I can never get it to balance well. I usually go for the full Windsor, and I honestly think that there is no defense in the world for the Half Windsor beyond laziness.

A while ago I heard that some mathematicians had worked out every conceivable way to tie a standard necktie. Nerdy? Yes. Necessary? Debatable. Awesome? Totally. I finally got around to reading what they wrote (which was published in Nature magazine, if you doubted its actual merit) and I was thoroughly impressed and amused. I sat here and tied a bunch of them just so I could lay them out and see the differences. Peep dis. The second page describes the nomenclature of the moves, and the "Conclusion" describes how to construct the ten most aesthetically pleasing knots. Not surprisingly, the four "named" knots appeared; these included the aforementioned Four-in-Hand, Half/Full Windsor, and the simple, practical and often overlooked "Pratt." They also presented 6 new knots in varying complexity. It's interesting that the simplest of their knots, basically a first-knot, is popular among the youth of red China. I could also see it being popular with US punk or pop-rock kids if some fashion-savvy frontman sported it on a magazine cover. Someone call Billie Joe Armstrong or Brandon Flowers. Tell them some nerds have some important fashion advice.