Jack Returns, a summer blockbuster in the making

Hello, The Internet. How are you.

Yes, it's me.

I hope this is not a bad time. I don't mean to barge in on you like this, but I just got the guts to come over and, well, I guess that's about as far as I had thought it out. I know I have been gone a long time, and I expect you have moved on. But I just wanted you to know that I thought about you often during my adventures. I did, I missed you, The Internet.

I missed the easy access to pop-culture and general information that Wikipedia so happily provides. I missed the ability to find a picture of anything at a moment's notice with Google. I have webcomics that have taken whole new directions since I last talked to them, and I feel left out of their new lives. I even missed writing a Thing on my blog, hoping that someone will read it someday. Any reader(s?) I had have undoubtedly given up on me. It was a risk I had to take. I had to go.

Adventures are great. Everyone should have Adventures. But when you come back it's hard to reintegrate in the busy world that has gone on without you. I have had so many new and different experiences, but all people want to know is, "How were the Adventures?" They sound mystified that their pat and disinterested "how are you" has been reworded, but they please themselves by expecting the same answer. "Adventures were great," you say, and nothing more. Somehow the content is out the window and my entire experience is summed up in one superlative. I try to follow up with stories, but my listeners' eyes glass over as they think about how great it is that yesterday and last week were the same as today. A drop of envy and the desire to return to the status quo go a long way.

How funny, here I am rambling like nothing has changed. Just like old times, huh Internet? I'm all going on about how no one wants to hear my great stories, and in the meantime I haven't told a single one. Honestly, now that I have the chance, I don't really feel like it. Another time, when you're interested.

Goodbye for now. I'm back now, and things are going to be, well, great.